narcissist happy after break up

If your no contact does succeed, youre not quite out of the woods. 6. He fed off my reaction to the things he would say to me, he thrived for my responses or me arguing back with him, etc. Tried to be ridiculously pragmatic about me moving out and diving up the things ( didnt want to discuss anything about the relationship, just bills, details). It took me many times to get here. This was the final time I left the relationship (number 7). Keep in mind that the entire time he has been gone before he came here to get everything, he never called; I didnt have any communicaton with him by phone or text. Im really upset as what we had was really special and it breaks my heart to know it will end. How I dont knew but I imagine something not legal Any ways. I couldnt. Abandoning her means abandoning my sons as well which I know is not true. Its been over a week since we broke up but this is only my second day without hearing from them. Its wonderful that you are getting thoughts from this article as well as from our discussion made at this place. Anything I said in my defense he would turn around, so now his mother hates me and the baby. I drew that line at that!!! What u have to realize is that these people are no good and will never change and as hard as it is u have to go on with your life without them! I returned home but didnt tell her that I went away. After half a month. We spent a lot of time talking at first (maybe I did too much talking as my past was used against me during the end stage); he was still married after I dont know how many years of separation during which time he strayed outside the marriage several times and had a child out of wedlock. Unfortunately for you, narcissists dont like being alone; theyre always searching for a source of supply, someone that can make them feel better about themselves. After two years, Ju was still living with her ex and while I made arrangements to move to her, she bought a house with her ex. about him. Feed me all this crap s perfect say. I dont know what to do. Im trying to decide if this guy I was seeing is a narcissist or just very selfish? Me and my boyfriend were seriously in love for six years and we were planning to get married but one day he came to my house and told me he was no longer interested in our relationship simply because he was dating another rich lady who promise to buy him a car and to sponsor their wedding. So I maintain the No Contact rule and a Not my circus, not my monkey attitude. (5) You want to be rich. The straw that broke the camels back was that I created a fake profile on a dating website with all of my demographics, but withy fake pictures attached. I said : okay, be well. Its been quite some time since you wrote your story on the board. Its so creepy he would just want.to stare into me for ages and i felt so uneasy He will be back in 8 weeks telling me yet again Im his soulmate .. Have my sole on the back of your head! Im assuming theyre still together, does this mean hell leave me along? Wants to control me. I am a beautiful person inside and out, and I do not deserve the way in which I have been treated. Later that same month he did not come home and called me that he wanted a divorce, I asked what I did wrong to deserve this from him, everything he was saying he wants a divorce that hates me and does not want To see me again in His life, I was crazy and also frustrated I do not know what to do, I was sick for more than 2 weeks due to divorce. This is how you treat my gifts ! I debated for a while but against my better judgement, I said I would when he was ready but that I wasnt going to wait the 9 years like the woman he was cheating on his wife with. Please see a therapist to help you deal with this person in a way that will lessen future damage . Lets start new. They are master minds at it to say the least. After this God shot of scrolling through the internet, I now know what he is. Sometimes you may find advice from people in the strangest of places. I talked to him about selling my belongings and it was the first time I saw crocodile tears. My kids were by then 20. The recovery from this kind of abuse is too hard, too painful. He made me feel like teh queen of his life when I met him, and when I moved countries to be with him ( he had many things he had done but he wasnt what I would call cruel). Start the healing process. I figure he must had many others on his sleeve and did not want to screw up and call me by the wrong name. Also I think that in his mind, not contacting me proves that he is better than my other exes, who had to be silenced. It's easy to assume once the breakup is initiated, your nightmare will finally be over. 1) It will feel sudden and brutal If they're breaking up with you, it will feel like a car crash you didn't see coming. so he can never say he never had a chance to be a dad. After reading a lot of materials on NPDs Im just afraid she will never change. Im going to put a different spin on this. ive a chilminder other days even though hes not working. These websites with very little scientifical background are dangerous and can ruin peoples lives. If he refuses to ever give your child back that can be seen as kidnapping also. They will drain you If you stay! We were married for 5 years & during our 3 year of marriage, I got pregnant with our daughter. They might contact you several months down the road when they have a need for supply thats going unfulfilled in their current relationship, but it doesnt take long for their attention to turn elsewhere. How much he doesnt care. there were up and downs.. mostly it was hell. I started investigating and discovered so many lies and deceit. So I told her its time for us to consider preparing the divorce papers and that Im seeing someone new. I am so lost sad and frankly scared for mental state I have heard much the last few days as his new victim is in Mexico with him at his moms house. Me always being I love with him I agree So that night Im driving him home he tells me hes going on a trip. He is a real and legit and all his techniques actually works just the way they ought to work. Heres the kicker: why do men tend to move on to someone who you might consider beneath you? But narcissists tend to ramp up their abusive tendencies during the breakup. He was a brilliant liar and great actor. the reasons were probably valid at the time they dissociated. That is why I put up with it I was the emphasis and he knew it from the start. I ended the relationship by filing for divorce, but co-parenting and visitation prevent me from having NO CONTACT. Unfortunately we are all going to have to deal with this gal for the next 18 years if we want our grandson in our lives, we have no idea how to accomplish this on a regular basis? He patted my sons head and said, Dont worry, we will find a good home for you. Like wow! This I know because anytime I think back to just before she entered my life or I read over the beginning of what Ive documented over the years, I truly struggle with believing I was that fairly warm hearted, trusting, compassionate guy who shared a fair amount of his time and energy with the community. Well after I attempted to expose him, he became quite abusive verbally. Dont do what I have done. Whatever the situation, the narcissists primary motivation after a breakup is finding a new source of supply or regaining their old one by pulling you back in. Another 15 minutes later, he comes back. I caved. Just remember all the lies and how he cheated on u! He uses everything against me, makes threats, twists stories around to make himself look good, in the process of baiting in his next Victim. Uh. I know now that I have to love myself and deep down I didnt I let myself go in my appearance I didnt care about myself anymore..He is a good liar and actor..He really didnt care at all that I was having health problems with all the stress. Only thing that makes me question who he is . He had come home that night to get all of his stuff and leave permanently. I was cute, carefree, and single so why not? Blackmail or Threats: The worst types of narcissists may try to hoover you by threatening to ruin your reputation or business. While narcissists have an inflated sense of pride, they have no qualms about returning to a relationship if they think it will benefit them. He tells me its to get his citizenship for Spain. this past week im trying no contsct but the verbal abuse via text is getting me down this is why i always give into his needs as its easier. I have a question, I am currently dealing with the break up of my psychopathic/narcissistic babys father. He just showed up at my job on Fathers Day drunk and crying saying he made a mistake that he loved me and needed me back that he would change blah blah blah! But let me first understand if I am a narcissist , sociopaths or a true heart possibly I shall be one of those classified analysis .. what we sow is what we reap and it works vice versa .. we see relationships from the community that goes on for years and years , my question is were u and ur psychopathic narcissist sociopathic boy/girlfriend did not feel love atleast a day and if that was not right what were the chances that had to spend lot of time with the people you blame .. let me point this , if you dont feel the mental compatibility in the beginning of even a small chat or if you dont spend a time together without a kiss for atleast a considerable amount of time and if you still feel the same way you felt when you started off your relationship let be me honest .. dont pretend that you are living on somebodys shoes maybe my partner who broke up with me had a different situation altogether as we have been breaking up for over 10 times in a month . Completely right just you and me. I wished i knew where we went wrong and got bad. Nothing. I know to stay strong and hang on. To my amazement being naive that these people exist now I have made it my mission to understand it for my own peace of mind. (6) you want to keep your husband / wife for you alone forever. I wish Id have never met him. He told me he was 27. I value myself now. They don't care if you're crying over them. The porn, the lies, text messages from women he met on these sites with nude pictures attached. My roommate was like dude he needs to call before he shows up. They denied their self the ability to feel, so now they have no feelings in their relationships. I knew my narc for many years in the City we live in. He was engaged when we met & I had no idea. But do narcissistic people respond to breakups differently than those who are less narcissistic? PTSD Among Ukrainian Civilians in the Russia-Ukraine War, Wolves With a Parasite Become More Daring, Study Shows, Sensory Issues Often Have Overlooked Consequences, Teen Mothers: When Stigma Trumps Compassion (and Research). I loved that guy and i wish hed just realize what hes done and bcm a better person for himself. Meet Cordae, How I Saved Grocery Money By Dating (Yes, Really), Miley & Liams Relationship Timeline Hit Me Like A Wrecking Ball, By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. I finally left him, and he simply went on holiday with his buddy. But if both parties can come to a fair and just agreement, the end result is far more satisfying. Rather than tell me some texts were making him mad. They are incapable of love and remorse, and the only reason they might "miss" you is that you have stopped being their narcissistic supply. It really irked me! Voila she then announced 3 months later she is pregnant. Against my better judgement I had to rescind the order to get the divorce. before i knew what was happening my husband gave me a call and told me that he was coming back to me in just 2days and was so happy to have him back to me. Next day he come back. He leaves his computer open one night to shower I was curious I look in his messages. I didnt know and finally didnt care. Anyway I took him back after he promised to change etc. When I would get so upset about how he didnt even NEED to know how I was, he would say he was busy and would get back to me. The. By the grace of god I went to college for 12 years and have a great career .i let him back in our lives 6 years ago as he convinced me he had found god. Just recently he told me he left my son in the care of some lady he never met, didnt know her last name or address, and I found that it was one of his girlfriends. That was an amazing descriptive /poetic /therapeutic venting of what I lived with my now ex-husband. I was so blinded by my narc. The answer is: It depends. Time heals all wounds and helps you to forget the pain the narcissist caused. I have tried it all; the discards, the triangulation, the gas lightning, the stalking, the projections, him getting almost violent.. It has effected my relationship with my daughter. He is afraid of the authorities so I wont see him again. He had so many other women and he is so clever that he changed some of their names to man names so I would not figure out it was other women calling and texting. There's no room for negotiation in their minds. With REAL sincerity, Your sister who knows your pain, Tina. The only way they can change is seriously an exorcism or having Devine interventionno lie! She was also very intelligent being a 30 year manager in a communications bussiness ! I am far from over it. Long hanging fruit gets picked first, perhaps you need to raise your bar a little bit. He is 84 years old and still screwing like hes 18 because he hasnt worked a day in 45 years. My life was so out of place last month when my Ex-boyfriend broke up with me. The qualities that drew him to you are a threat. Especially if I have to pay child support. Basically I feel like he will always have a foothold in my life, because of my son, I feel he planned this entire situation strategically, and I feel so lost, alone, and empty that Im deeply afraid that he will use my son to destroy me forever. (2) You always have nightmares. i was propose to be marriage by a love one, but he suddenly changed his mind just because he found him self a new love, my heart was broken and so devastated to the extend of committing suicide, a friend of mine introduce me to a powerful doctor called Dr. KATE. Hed been staying with her on those disappearing times and when he was supposedly traveling on his truck overnight. When you're with a narcissist, they're very good at keeping your focus on them. Hong long does it take for a Narcissist to come back? He was cold as ice to me; it was my fault, I put him out again. As with all questions related to a narcissistic ex, the answer is an unsatisfying it depends. How, if you have and where, and if not, what is going on with you and if you feel as I do. Nobody will ever get him for real. Narcissists usually dont have lasting relationships though, so theres a good chance youll be seeing them again when the next one fails. This wont go on forever. I have forgotten how many times she left me and the pattern was becoming familiar. At first, I tried taking him back, not realizing what he was and that hed never change. So when I returned he once again stated lashing out, but this this armed with the advise I had, I didnt go back and forth with him. Yes! All he had in him for me was contempt and rage!! After a month of, feeling like my world was over I started to look for hope anywhere I, could find it. Hes trying to make me look irrational and insane in front of everyone. Finding out that that I have NPD has been an eyeopener and I have been seeking professional help for it. HA!. I know this as I am now a useless. that is the true way to dignity, healing, inner peace and ultimately genuine, long-lasting happiness. All the articles I read say that we should expect contact, but I havent heard from my narcissistic ex since I ended the relationship three months ago. Last Updated on July 4, 2022 by Alexander Burgemeester. and send his picture. It was a horrible split-up.I ignored him, totally..but he wouldnt stop..and still continues to this day.I should have known something was way wrong with him in the very beginning, he always spoke of how he was getting DSS to investigate some old GF..always hurting someone, because they had to levae his abusive ass! I lost many friends. Had a on /off relationship with him for 16 more terrible years..we have two kids who now are adults. Like how could someone do someone who had great intentions so badly??? We met each other families and everyone told us we were perfect for each other. LeaveANarc, yes I do understand, though my discard of him just happened. This is so spot on! I consider her a N Sociopath, and believe me when I say that from my own experience with Ns, My mother is the absolute worst and there is no N man that I know of who could compare to my mothers viciousness and manipulations. She told me alot about him and hed told her alot about me which most Im sure were lies. He threw himself into his new job and couldnt have cared less that I was there or not. Today is my day two of NC with her but this time, I feel like I am guilty of hiding that pic and I feel I betrayed her. Brightest Blessings. I only wish the HE could be changed to a THEY! Well first. In a way, their loss (being with the narcissist) is your gain. I tried absolutely everything to fix the relationship. 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